A Lampie's not engaged

A Lampie's not engaged

Following a horrendous get in (which preceded quite an eventful year) where Murphy's law was proved beyond all reasonable doubt, and very nearly everything LXical that could go wrong did, the Chief LX decided that "When a felon's not engaged in his employment." could be rewritten as the far more pertinent "When a lampie's not engaged in his employment". With some help from the LX designer, the following was produced and performed for cabaret at Kirkby Lonsdale.

Performed by Simon, Andrew, Beth and a reluctant Linden (thanks also to Smirnoff for encouraging her!)

Introduction (spoken)

LX Designer: Well, that was another hugely successful day's work.

Chief LX: Yeah, give me another 3 or 4 hours and I might just get Katy powered up.

LX Designer: I just wish everyone would get off our case. It's not our fault the kit's dodgy.

Chief LX: It's such a shame no one round here appreciates a good lampy.

LX Designer: Maybe we should have thought about that before we joined Mugss.

LAMPIES: We Should

LX: It's too late now,

LAMPIES: It is

10 Song – When a lampie's not engaged in his employment. (v1.77)

LX: When a lampie's not being hassled by the stage crew

LAMPIES: by the stage crew

LX: Or poring over scribbled lighting plans

LAMPIES: Lighting plans

LX: His capacity for drinking quite a fair few

LAMPIES: Quite a fair few

LX: Is just as great as any other man's

LAMPIES: Other man's

LX: All the wiring is so screwy in the Renold

LAMPIES: In the Renold

LX: When illuminating duty's to be done

LAMPIES: To be done

LX: Ah, take one consideration with another

LAMPIES: With another

LX: A lampie's lot is not a happy one

ALL: Ah, when illuminating duty's to be done, to be done,
A lampies's lot is not a happy one, happy one.

LX: (Oh), when dear old Katy's fuses are a-blowing

LAMPIES: Are a-blowing

LX: And the neutral starts to float around at times

LAMPIES: 'Round at times

LX: He loves to see the pretty lights a-glowing

LAMPIES: Lights a-glowing

LX: And listen to the 50 Hertz mains whine

LAMPIES: Hertz mains whine

LX: When the bodge box needs a little more quick bodging

LAMPIES: More quick bodging

LX: He would love to be a-drinking having fun

LAMPIES: Having fun

LX: Ah, take one consideration with another

LAMPIES: with another

LX: A lampie's lot is not a happy one

ALL: Ah, when illuminating duty's to be done, to be done
A lampie's lot is not a happy one, happy one.